1st Post

So, it is true... shocking as it may be, that I do in fact hate meetings. I used the word "We" in the title of this blog instead of "I" because chances are (I would guess) better then average that you also hate meetings. I can't think of a single time that I have spent any time, any time at all in a meeting and came away thinking to myself, "that was a worth while experience, and I am a better person for having had it"... This even holds true for meetings that I have held, where I'm the one presenting whatever the "it" or "thing" is that needs to be displayed, discussed, argued over, whatever the case may be. Usually in the end I feel guilty for having forced innocent coworkers, to have participated at all.

There is a single thing that will make a meeting at least tolerable. Have you figured it out yet? Are you even guessing? Yes, yes you're right... it's booze...  Who doesn't love a well prepared cocktail, a cold beer, a little (or not so little) glass of wine. Booze is a welcome distraction that not only allows you to be physically doing something with your hands, but helps you to care less about how much you might have otherwise been considering taking your own life rather then spending another single second in this meeting.

Plus, depending on how much a little drink affects you, maybe you raise your hand, or if you've had more then a little, maybe you stand right up and blurt out some unbelievably great idea. It will probably happen at some unbelievably poor moment in time, but booze helped you to be assertive and get noticed. So 10 points for you, and 10 points for booze. It also helped everyone who just witnessed your explosion of 'great idea' to enjoy themselves a little more.

While I think booze is the secret to meeting success. I'm thwarted almost every time there is to be a meeting. I'll suggest, "hey, why don't we have the meeting at (insert nameless generic restaurant) down the street, you know so that we can get a bite to eat"... 'bite to eat' being thinly veiled code for 'drink a lot'... if I'm to be honest on rare occasions this has worked. But those occasions are way too few and far between. Sometime I just flat out say, we should bring drinks to the meeting. That, I can tell you with 100% accuracy, always goes completely nowhere.

Now for a painful truth, my plan and I use the term "plan" loosely is to write this blog as if I was speaking. So I think we can all assume that good grammar, spelling, syntax, punctuation, etc. are going to go out the proverbial window.  Also, fair warning in case you hadn’t noticed, I am a big fan of ellipsis... yes, "..."

If reading this blog with my unusual typography pains you, please stop. If not, continue on.

My plan continues with me writing about whatever I feel like, at no prescribed intervals of time. So if that isn't a recipe for success, I'm really not sure what is.

Please feel free to comment, -Me